How Your Thoughts Create Your Reality


October 20, 2014

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Last week on my group coaching call, there was a brave woman who virtually raised her hand to ask a few questions. She admitted that she’s been trying to get her driver’s license for about five years. For some reason, even though she’s confident when she practices before the test, once she gets in that car, every thing goes haywire, and she ends up failing. Her anxiety level skyrockets, and her nerves cause her to morph into a very unconfident driver.

So I asked her what she’s thinking right before the test, and she said things like the following…

  • I’m going to crash.
  • I’m going to die.
  • I really can’t do this.
  • I’m just going to fail again.
  • I just can’t stay calm.
  • Oh my God, Oh My God, Oh My God!
  • I’m going to kill myself.

Once she uttered those phrases, she realized what was going on. It’s a classic case of our thoughts becoming our reality, right? Or self-fulfilling prophecy as many people call it.

No matter what success you’re after – whether it’s getting your dream job, getting pregnant, passing your driver’s test, or even an important conversation with a loved one, the way you think about the scenario in your mind is going to create your reality.

One of my mentors even goes as far as to say that success is between your temples (i.e. your thoughts).

Another example of this is (once again) from the Oprah event. At the end of the two-day experience, the gorgeous Amy Purdy came out on stage. For those of you who don’t know, she’s a paralympian snowboarder who contracted a form of bacterial meningitis and was given a 2% chance of surviving. She made it through but lost both of her legs from the illness.

Amy is absolutely incredible in that she said that the very day after her operation, she visualized herself snowboarding down a mountain. The picture in her mind was so strong, that she said she could feel the wind rushing past her and the chill in the air. She said she knew without a doubt that the goal of being in the Olympics one day was non-negotiableand that she was going to make it happen. So for years, she kept that image in the forefront of her mind until she won the Bronze Medal in 2014.

Since then, she’s been on Dancing with the Stars in the US and has created a company that designs shoes for prosthetic feet. Amazing, right?! (She’s even been a model on The Price Is Right which I love!)

So what can you do to put a positive spin on your thoughts and use visualization to achieve your goals?

Well with the lovely lady on my coaching call, we discussed a few things that you can apply to situations in your own life:

  1. By recognizing her negative thoughts, she now has the ability to flip them around. When she hears those negative voices in her head before her test, she can “flip the switch” and move into a more positive frame of mind.
  2. I advised her to use the phrase “I can, I will, and I am ______” if she needs help flipping the switch.
  3. I told her to buy herself a bottle of champagne or a new wallet before her test as a sign of believing that she would definitely be celebrating the success of passing the test later on that evening.
  4. Finally we talked about her visualizing herself getting that license from now until the day she takes the test again in January 2015. And when I asked her what she was picturing in her mind, she said she saw herself getting the license and then hugging the car! I love that image, and I am also going to hold that in my mind until she emails me with that exact photo next year!

So what about you? Where are your thoughts creating your reality in a way that isn’t so hot? Where can you “flip the switch”?

This week, I’d love for you to recognize where your thoughts are in the gutter and then flip them around. And as always, I’d love to hear about all of the success I know is coming your way!

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I started I Heart My Life from my kitchen table in a tiny London apartment in 2013.

After going through a 5-year quarter-life crisis, I discovered the world of personal development and the power of a gratitude journal and finally got clear on my true purpose in life: to help women fall in love with themselves and their lives. I Heart My Life has gone through many transformations over the years, but its mission has always remained the same: we exist to teach you how to create a life that you love.


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