14 Things That Are Killing Your Dreams…


July 17, 2017

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A few weeks ago, I was on a call with a client and she said something so beautiful that I want to share with you today.

She said, “I know it’s time to grow and move into the person I know I can be.”

Maybe you relate with that, lovely.

The only problem?

We often don’t know how to make that happen. How do we get to that place? How do we shift out of victim mode, indecision, lack of clarity etc.?

We often get stuck in a stop/start pattern and trust me, I’ve been there too.

One of the things I realized recently though was that being in that pattern is such an energy drain. I know for me, when I’m in a place in indecision or dream limbo, it’s brutal.

And what I’ve learned is that when I’m in that place, I have to remind myself of this:

The truth is, if you have the desire you can figure out the rest of it. Your heart is actually the most important part of the equation.

What I mean by that is if the desire is in your heart, it’s there for a reason and you have to trust yourself and believe that even though you don’t know all of what it will take to get to where you want to be, you do have what it takes within yourself and you can figure things out as you go.

It’s so much better to just take action and do something. Don’t stay stuck, just waiting for the perfect time because – let’s be honest – that time may never come.

In one of my favorite new books The Quantum Leap Strategy by Price Pritchett, the author says:

“Don’t tell yourself that you need more time to get organized or lay out a comprehensive plan. You may not be aware of it, but a lot of that work has already been done. It’s waiting in your subconscious mind, so just trust your instincts and begin.”

The author then describes 14 ways in which we hold ourselves back. Here they are…

#1: The Be Reasonable trap — limiting your goals to what you think you “can have” instead of what you “want”.

#2: The Half Throttle trap — living life with a lukewarm heart.

#3: The More of the Same trap — reliance on trying harder instead of trying differently.

#4: The Doubt trap — believing in your limits instead of testing the limits.

#5: The Faith in the Familiar trap — relying on your usual routines.

#6: The Methodology trap — focusing on means rather than ends.

#7: The What I can’t See Isn’t There trap — thinking you have to do it all by yourself.

#8: The Playing it Safe trap — choosing the wrong risks.

#9: The Passivity trap — wishing for what you want instead of pursuing what you want.

#10: The Failures Aren’t Allowed trap — unwillingness to make mistakes (and interpreting problems as proof you should give up and quit).

#11: The Comfort Junkie trap — being afraid to confront fear.

#12: The Use It or Lose It trap — not opening your gifts.

#13: The Preparation trap — bogging down in getting ready.

#14: The Perfect Timing trap — waiting for the “right” circumstances.

If I had to guess, I’d bet at least one (and probably several) of these have applied to you at one point or another. I know I’ve certainly had to work through several of these traps myself, so I get it!

And maybe some of these “traps” are things you’re struggling with right now as you read this – if so, I want you to know that these traps are only temporary, and you have the power to escape them.

The key to all of these is actually really simple: Drop the doubt and take action.

Doubt is killing your dreams. Your launch. Your sales. All of it.

Once I grasped that in my own life and biz, that’s when everything started to shift.

Does it mean I never have moments of feeling stuck in a place of indecision? Nope – we’re all human, after all. But when those moments creep up on me now, I’m quick to remind myself to listen to my heart and trust that what I need to know to make things happen are – as Marie Forleo would say – totally figure-out-able.

The same is true for you, lovely. Whether you realize it or not, your subconscious mind is already working to help you figure out how to get from point A to point Z in your life and biz.

You simply have to trust yourself and take the next steps forward.

So lovely, what can you do this week to get started? In what ways do you need to trust your instincts and just go for it?

You’re more ready than you realize, lovely. Your dreams are there for a reason, so listen to your heart and let it guide you on your journey. You can do this!

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I started I Heart My Life from my kitchen table in a tiny London apartment in 2013.

After going through a 5-year quarter-life crisis, I discovered the world of personal development and the power of a gratitude journal and finally got clear on my true purpose in life: to help women fall in love with themselves and their lives. I Heart My Life has gone through many transformations over the years, but its mission has always remained the same: we exist to teach you how to create a life that you love.


We believe that life's too short to be subtle, that everything you want wants you back and in elevating your everyday, whatever that means to you. This is the I Heart My Life Show.